Before you read any further, make sure you read Trevor’s latest entry, it's a doozy. (blog etiquette and all…)
We had only been to church twice before I got a call last Tuesday to give the lesson in Elder’s quorum for this past Sunday. I thought I had done everything right, including:
1. Arrived the first Sunday 10 minutes late
2. Introduced myself without mentioning BYU or my mission
3. Wore a brown shirt, then a blue shirt
4. Left the top button undone
Nick, without going the way of sandals, what else could I have done? You should seriously consider opening up your own consulting service, maybe a musical collaboration with John Bytheway....
Anyway, while my lesson went well on Sunday (not as good as Cint, mind you), that isn’t what this snippet is about: I am truly wondering what the majority of the women in the family feel about some anecdotal evidence or the recurring motif that I have encountered during my short 27 years as a church meeting attender. I am specifically referring to those Sundays known as Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. The general observation to which I refer is how women receive flowers, either carnation or potted, and the men receive some sort of bite-sized morsel; a candy bar, cookies, etc.
Frankly, I think giving things out during the aforementioned days are highly overrated. But it seems as though if I were a woman, I would be extremely jealous of the guys. In both of the wards we have been in here in Texas, they have given Snickers and (2) chewy white chocolate and macadamia nut cookies, respectively, to the guys and carnations to the women. I would be absolutely outraged. But of course, I am no woman so I may be way off base here.
Maybe they should just give out pass-a-long cards, or breath mints.
By the way, this is a rhetorical question of sorts, so don’t feel compelled to answer.
We had only been to church twice before I got a call last Tuesday to give the lesson in Elder’s quorum for this past Sunday. I thought I had done everything right, including:
1. Arrived the first Sunday 10 minutes late
2. Introduced myself without mentioning BYU or my mission
3. Wore a brown shirt, then a blue shirt
4. Left the top button undone
Nick, without going the way of sandals, what else could I have done? You should seriously consider opening up your own consulting service, maybe a musical collaboration with John Bytheway....
Anyway, while my lesson went well on Sunday (not as good as Cint, mind you), that isn’t what this snippet is about: I am truly wondering what the majority of the women in the family feel about some anecdotal evidence or the recurring motif that I have encountered during my short 27 years as a church meeting attender. I am specifically referring to those Sundays known as Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. The general observation to which I refer is how women receive flowers, either carnation or potted, and the men receive some sort of bite-sized morsel; a candy bar, cookies, etc.
Frankly, I think giving things out during the aforementioned days are highly overrated. But it seems as though if I were a woman, I would be extremely jealous of the guys. In both of the wards we have been in here in Texas, they have given Snickers and (2) chewy white chocolate and macadamia nut cookies, respectively, to the guys and carnations to the women. I would be absolutely outraged. But of course, I am no woman so I may be way off base here.
Maybe they should just give out pass-a-long cards, or breath mints.
By the way, this is a rhetorical question of sorts, so don’t feel compelled to answer.
9 comments:
Now I know I'm not a woman of the family (I did cut my hair, you know) but I have to add that last year for Mother's Day, the Elder's Quorum president thought it would be a great idea to hand out.... Homemade music CDs with legal copies of church music downloaded from the church website.
I'm sure some women liked it (LAME, LAME, LAME). I can make a copy for anyone if they'd like one.
Thanks for the offer, Clint, but I heard enough EFY cd's during the mission to last a lifetime. That's why my Sunday hits include songs such as Postal Service, Yellowcard, and Lil' John. They're mellow enough to get me in the mood.
Dude, it's all about the vibe. You can dress the part, which helps, but also it's not not participating. What I mean by that is suppose the Sunday School teacher, Glenn Beck says, in the context of The Vision (D&C 76), "Man, this stuff is great. Nobody has ever come up with anything close to the three degrees of glory." Raise your hand and say something like "Well, actually, Emmanuel Swedenborg also had a tri-level soteriological structure although it was depicted in a concentric fashion as opposed to a vertical hierarchy." Then, before anybody has time to respond or ask what exactly is "soteriology", you say "We have one instance of Joseph's commentary on Swedenborg who said that he was `half right'." See, it's not just about looking like you could go postal at any moment but that you reinforce appearances by bizarre commentary. Since unpredictability is the goal, for example I wore nice shoes, dress slacks, white shirt (ironed), and a pink tie last week. It also helps if your emasculating wife frightens all the male leadership.
What's funny is that I think we've been informally dropped from involvment in the Activities Committee. The co-chair is an art history doctoral candidate specializing in early Christian manuscripts and I don't think he likes me because I've tried to have a couple of academic conversations with him and he blows me off every time. Either that or he didn't like Kim telling him what he should have done better about the last activity. But as I was telling Mom, after the last activity I swept the entire floor, put away most of the chairs, took out the trash, and cleaned the kitchen. Granted, everybody else was wearing Sunday attire while I was in shorts, flip-flops, and my shirt that says "Sweep the leg" (thanks, Clint).
By the way, I didn't mean to name drop. It's just that since Chad probably listens to his radio show and watches him on CNN after Sean Hannity, I wanted him to be able to picture what was said.
Fathers have not received a thing since we have lived in this ward. I asked the Bishop if I could do something this year, and he said "no" I actually think it should be equal opportunity for both mothers and fathers. Last year we got chocolate covered strawberries in a gift box whick was pretty good. But all the other times we have got a lame booklet on Mothers. I just threw them in my file cabinet and haven't looked at them since. Personally, I liked what I did in Madera for Father's Day.... - Sugar Daddy's. Cool....
Hey Nick, since you seem to know GB pretty well, can you ask him something for me? Is he wearing his G's in the picture (vis a vis your link) under the blue column called "Live Events"
Man, I hope not. I thought missionaries were the only ones who took pictures in g's.
Oh, were you in a new ward because you secretely bought a house and moved in without telling us? At least the ward that we moved into when we bought our new house that we told everyone about gives out candy on Mother's Day.
I also need to defend myself from Nick's post. I simply mentioned to that activities chair that when you have a bunch of overweight overeaters, one donut per person doesn't cut it, and of course there will be more left-over fruit than you can shake a stick at. Also, I can't help that men in the church are threatened by a woman in their career field.
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