Question of the night

Post-game question of the night:

Michelle Tafoya: So, Robert [Horry], this is your sixth championship. How was it playing with these guys? How does this compare to your other championship teams?

Robert (thinking to himself): Who is this lady and why is she asking me dumb questions? What does she want me to say, that the one I won with the Rockets the first time around was better because I wore tighter shorts? In the words of Napolean Dynamite: "Idiot."

Time to bid farewell

In case anyone hasn't heard the tragic news:

Shawn Bradley is in the process of opting out of his contract and retiring.

What a sad day in all the land. Chad's favorite player is hanging up his white British Knights. What can we say that his stat line for this last year doesn't already tell us:

• PPG (Points per game) - 2.7
  
• RPG (Rebounds per game) - 2.8
  
• APG (Assists per game) - 0.2
  
• BPG (Blocks per game) - 0.8
  

Too bad he couldn't have finished his career going to the NBA finals. I would have liked to see him play against Rasheed "I finally scored ten points in a game and now everyone thinks I'm the greatest player to play the game, especially Hughbie Brown" Wallace.

Merry Christmas

After much deliberation and thought, we decided to do as we have done in other years and draw names for Christmas. So I hired the accounting firm of G N and T and here are the results for this year's gift drawing. Any jokes and scintillating comments will be viewed with the most discerning eye. But any wishes and dreams can be "blogged" and if desired, can be taken to heart.
Nick - Samantha
Kim - Chad
Clint - Mike
Mayka - Jenn
Chad - Trevor
Jenn - Kim
Samantha - Nick
Mike - Clint
Trevor - Mayka

The guidelines are $10 - $15.00 or homemade. Don't worry about getting anything for Dad or I because just having you here is gift enough. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...................

I knew it was a bad day when I forgot to brush my teeth

On the way to the train station Thursday morning, I realized that I left home without brushing my teeth. I also forgot my ID and keys for work, but I didn't think my day would be that bad. To be honest, it wasn't until about 4:48 p.m. when I was waiting for the train and found out that all overhead powerlines were down and therefore all trains out of the city were completely inoperable. Nick and I were both stuck; he was at 30th street and I was 15 blocks away in center city. I actually had to use a pay phone (which now costs $0.50 a call!) because the cellular phone network was overloaded and I couldn't get a call out. $1.50 later I had arranged with the day care for a friend to pick up Aiden and for Nick and I to wait 30 minutes and then talk again regarding how we would get home if the trains were still down. During the 30 minutes, both Nick and I had the great idea to meet, but neither of us could get through to the other, so he took the subway to 15th street, and I took it to 30th. When we could finally reach each other, he got back on the subway to 30th where I joined him on the subway. We had to go another 39 blocks west to another "transportation depot" and catch a trolley that was supposed to take a to a bus to take us to the train station where we could get our car. I don't think I could do justice in describing the people on the trolley quite like Samantha can, but lets just say that among the entirely packed trolley, there was one extremely overweight old man that should really get that growth on his arm checked out. By the time the trolley got close to where we were supposed to transfer to the bus, I noticed that all the other transfer bus routes were nicely labeled on the trolley map in the car, but there was no connection to the mysterious bus we needed to take. Completely defeated I called my friends that had picked up Aiden and asked them to come meet us at the mall and take us to our car. We got the car, went back and got the kid, and finally got home at 7:55, an hour and fifty-five minutes late for Nick's appointment with the Elders' Quorum to help our neighbor move. The point of the story is that it took us 3 hours and 15 minutes to get home!!! We have to buy a house closer to the city.

stay healthy -- have a laugh

Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.

I think I got a healthy amount of laughing in over the last few days , and now I am really looking forward to Christmas, for health reasons.

100 oz. <-----Click

I am not even going to try to write something funny because this bad boy speaks for itself, and I am not talking about Trevor.

Floodgate 2005

First of all, I've never been through a hurricane and lived to tell about it. I have, however, been through the flash flood areas in southern California ("The Dips" - Please don't remind me of Mom offering me cheese as I'm about to barf all over the place.) and while the floods never came, I often thought of what it would be like if they had. Well, I finally experienced it this evening. (I don't count the torrential monsoons in Ecuador because that was the mission and things like that are supposed to happen.)

We were out shopping at Joanne Fagrits (according to the boys) and upon leaving the store, noticed the ominous clouds moving over head. We quickly had the boys loaded in and strapped to their seats in record time (14 minutes and 36 seconds) and headed home.

About 2 miles from home the rain really hit.

I actually had to put the intermittent wipers on regular speed (due to some pleading from Mayka to "not give in to the Tustison Logic at a time like this!"). By the time we reached home and pulled in, the water was flowing like the salmon of Capistrano and the older two boys were getting a bit jumpy. (Rhys, for his part, was wondering when in the world his knees were going to arrive.)

Mayka and I sat in the car wondering how we were going to get everyone inside. Finally, we? came to the conclusion that I would get out of the car, go unlock the door to the apartment, come back to the car, get Riley, take him to the apartment, go back to the car, get Sam, take him to the apartment, go back to the car (see a pattern emerging?), get Rhys, and take him to the apartment. Mayka was in charge of getting the fagrit inside without incident.

Well, the plan looked good on paper (or the wipe, as it were) and so 3...2...1... I was out the door, shin deep in water, pushing my way to the apartment when...

Did I mention I was wearing Old Navy flip flops? Nice blue ones, too.

...in the confusion and mess of water, and while almost being carried away by a riptide, one flip flop came off. As it went hurdling under the car, I reached out with my foot and trapped it and managed to stick it back on my foot. I ran to the apartment, unlocked the door, grabbed a raincoat, and prepared myself to rescue my family.

I put the raincoat over my head, waded back out to the car and grabbed Riley.

(Now that I think about it, Mayka should have just grabbed the kids by the wrist and ankle and helicoptered them to the front door there was so much water. It would have been like old times (Wiest Lake, my birthday, Samantha's arm in a cast...).)

Needless to say, we didn't think of that soon enough, so I grabbed Riley and headed back to the apartment. I took a single step and BAM!, my flip flop was once again whisked off and heading under the car. I reached for it in vain with my foot and watched in despair as it was swallowed up by the rapids. I made a split second decision and chose to save Riley instead of my flip flop and carried him to the door. I kicked off my other flip flop and struggled to catch a glimpse of my struggling flip flop as it headed towards its imminent destruction, the storm drain.

Not many of you will know what it feels like to be hurling toward your doom, struggling to stop yourself as the water hurls you onward. Believe me (as one who's fallen into a river and gotten lost at Disneyland), it's not as fun as eating carne asada, that's for sure.

So, I'm now barefoot and working my way back to the car to get Sam. He's in the car, but hesitating. He's not sure if he wants to come out. I for one am completely soaked and for some reason still using the rain slicker over my head. Finally Sammy makes up his mind and chooses to come with me. (Thanks for taking your time, Sam!)

I drop him off in the house and then head back for Rhys, the calmest one of the whole bunch. ("That's so weird I don't have knees! I wonder when...")

Mayka hands him to me and I'm off, back to the apartment, soaked to the bone, wondering why in the world anybody would ever want a house with a garage. Apartments are the greatest thing since 46 oz. fountain drinks.

Mayka is right behind me and is preciously guarding her fabric store purchase. I tell Mayka of my loss and we gaze out longingly from the front door to see if we can catch a glimpse of the sacrificial flip flop.

There's no sign of the recently departed, so Mayka suggests I go upstairs and get el Jefe: my 10,000,000 candle power Costco special spotlight. That thing nearly has X-ray vision. Maybe we can use it to locate the flip flop.

I run upstairs, unlock it from its case, head downstairs, hoist it on my shoulder, and fire that baby up. It practically lights car tires on fire it's so bright but even with the extra light source we had no luck finding the flip flop.

Mayka then decides to take matters into her own hands by doing some recon work right in the eye of the storm. She takes off towards the storm drain wearing jeans and a black blouse (perfect combat gear) in hopes of finding the missing pair of $3.50 flip flops. The flip flop, however, is as elusive as Osama and turns up MIA. She comes back and informs me that there is no way it could have survived the plunge and we're forced to give up the search for good.

We close the door, calm everyone's fears (except for Rhys, who's now wondering if he has elbows) and put on some hot chocolate as we get ready for FHE.

Sam and Riley have calmed down and now seem to be more distraught over the fact that I've lost my flip flop and that tomorrow I'm going to have to buy a new one. Over the next three hours until they fall asleep in our bed, they ask every 3.4 seconds if my flip flop is lost and if I'm going to buy a new one tomorrow. Very similar to the "Aiden-threw-the-ABCD's-in-the-trash-and-tia-Kim-got-them-out-story" that some of you may well be familiar with.

Well, as of the now the rain has stopped and the boys are asleep. It's been a very trying past three hours and I need my sleep because I think we might have a candle light vigil in order to meditate on this latest tragedy in the lives of the MTF (Maryland Tustison Family).

Bets Anyone?

From inside sources I know that the SLC Tustison home is abuzz with anticipation for the arrival of the last sibling as he returns from, what Chad would call, la patria de Mayka. His pending arrival, I'm sure, has illicited curiousity as to what will be encountered. Will Trevor still pause at every reflection of himself? How long before he asks for his CDs or replaces his ensemble with purchases of Michael McLean, Afterglow, and old EFY CDs? Will he leave his established reputation as a indefatigable employee at media services, as Chad would attest, to pursue a spiritually lucrative career at the MTC? Anyway, to have some fun with the speculation I was thinking Dad should coordinate some gambling opportunities for the rest of family. For example:

• What is the over/under of the duration of Trevor's morning scripture study?
  
• What is the 'run line' on whether or not Trevor goes on splits the first week?
  
• What is the straight wager on how many times Trevor talks about getting married within the first year of being back?
  

Does anybody else have any suggestions?

I never thought Mayka would say it...

We were making dinner (Chad and Jenn's fabulous Coke beef recipe (by the way, we used Lime Coke and it was excellent)), and as Mayka was cutting the limes, she said:

"I miss Tucanos. I would even eat some bacon-wrapped turkey."

Shock of the century, I know. I'm still trying to get over it.