**Harry Potter Spoiler Alert**
Can you believe Hermione makes out with Malfoy’s cousin and that Voldermort is really Dumbledorf’s half brother?!?!?!?!
Anyway, I was going to wait for a special occasion to let everyone know the biggest news out of our home here in San Antonio (and no, I’m not pregnant), but I can’t hold it back anymore. To be honest, I have been meaning to let everyone know but I was afraid of the possible backlash. I knew Mom and Dad would be okay with it since they made the switch many years ago, but the rest of you, well, I was feeling like I might be shunned…..Anyway, here’s the news:
I’ve switched to Diet Soda.
I know, I know, I can’t believe it either. And I know what you’re thinking: “How could he do this? He always said he would never switch? I don’t even know him anymore.” Well, before you call A & E, let me give you 4 reasons in my top 100 reasons why I did this:
Note: The switch to diet soda will now be referred to as “The Switch”
Reason #73: If you’ve lost count, I am turning 29 this December. I’m not as young as I used to be. I have worse knees than “Bad Knees,” I have bursitis in my right hip and left shoulder, and my scoliosis doubles as a party tray on the weekends. The regular soda, loaded with sugar probably doesn’t help. The diet probably doesn’t help either but it sure makes me feel better. That’s like when people say money can’t buy happiness. Well, it can sure make sadness a lot more bearable.
Reason #58: Limits. Barriers. Quotas. This is what I had before I started drinking Diet. Before The Switch, I put a self-imposed limit of one soda per day at the most to feel and look somewhat healthy. Can you imagine?!?! I know, impossible, right. Some days there were not enough drops to savor. Of course, I soon found ways to get around the one-can rule. I would let Jenn have a sip and convince myself that she drank at least half of it. I would remember a day two weeks prior when I didn’t have a drink and felt obligated to make up for that day. I developed a selective memory, quickly forgetting a drink I had 20 minutes prior. Now….I can take down 24 ounces during the opening credits of Man vs. Wild (great show by the way). Another thing with The Switch is that I don’t feel like I have to drink as much to be satisfied.
Reason #51: The Texas-Mexico border has the highest rates of Diabetes in the world, about 13%. Regular soda, combined with Rudy’s barbeque (not barbecoa), the greasiest “white people” Mexican food in the world and the new p’zone from Pizza Hut probably isn’t the best way to fight the epidemic. Did anyone say, “Top Ten Fattest City in the U.S?” It’s not uncommon to see on the street a baby being fed a bottle full of Big Red Soda (cross between fruit punch and cream soda). Normally you wouldn’t know it’s Big Red if it weren’t for the Mother carrying a liter under each armpit.
Reason #39: Like many of you, I remember those days watching Clint or Nick playing little league, Mom coming home from work, or times when we’d be choking on Taco Soup. All three of these things have one thing in common: Mom holding a Diet Coke. Each of us, at one time or another, fell into the trap of sipping from that lipstick laden straw, convincing ourselves that it would taste good. Nope, wrong—at least at the time. Well, for me, I think my taste buds have changed. Before, I would rather have drunk a broccoli beerock shake than a swig of the Diet. Now, I find the regular stuff almost too sweet! And if I have a lime wedge available, that goes right in to the cup. I know, The Switch—it’s not diet, it’s a lifestyle change.
Now, I never thought the day would come when my food storage consisted of 36-can cases of Dr. Pepper in the garage, let alone Diet Dr. Pepper. You must be willing to adapt in this society. And to reassure all of you: Stranded. Desert Island. Water or Dr. Pepper. Dr Pepper. No Contest.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to check on my food storage.
Can you believe Hermione makes out with Malfoy’s cousin and that Voldermort is really Dumbledorf’s half brother?!?!?!?!
Anyway, I was going to wait for a special occasion to let everyone know the biggest news out of our home here in San Antonio (and no, I’m not pregnant), but I can’t hold it back anymore. To be honest, I have been meaning to let everyone know but I was afraid of the possible backlash. I knew Mom and Dad would be okay with it since they made the switch many years ago, but the rest of you, well, I was feeling like I might be shunned…..Anyway, here’s the news:
I’ve switched to Diet Soda.
I know, I know, I can’t believe it either. And I know what you’re thinking: “How could he do this? He always said he would never switch? I don’t even know him anymore.” Well, before you call A & E, let me give you 4 reasons in my top 100 reasons why I did this:
Note: The switch to diet soda will now be referred to as “The Switch”
Reason #73: If you’ve lost count, I am turning 29 this December. I’m not as young as I used to be. I have worse knees than “Bad Knees,” I have bursitis in my right hip and left shoulder, and my scoliosis doubles as a party tray on the weekends. The regular soda, loaded with sugar probably doesn’t help. The diet probably doesn’t help either but it sure makes me feel better. That’s like when people say money can’t buy happiness. Well, it can sure make sadness a lot more bearable.
Reason #58: Limits. Barriers. Quotas. This is what I had before I started drinking Diet. Before The Switch, I put a self-imposed limit of one soda per day at the most to feel and look somewhat healthy. Can you imagine?!?! I know, impossible, right. Some days there were not enough drops to savor. Of course, I soon found ways to get around the one-can rule. I would let Jenn have a sip and convince myself that she drank at least half of it. I would remember a day two weeks prior when I didn’t have a drink and felt obligated to make up for that day. I developed a selective memory, quickly forgetting a drink I had 20 minutes prior. Now….I can take down 24 ounces during the opening credits of Man vs. Wild (great show by the way). Another thing with The Switch is that I don’t feel like I have to drink as much to be satisfied.
Reason #51: The Texas-Mexico border has the highest rates of Diabetes in the world, about 13%. Regular soda, combined with Rudy’s barbeque (not barbecoa), the greasiest “white people” Mexican food in the world and the new p’zone from Pizza Hut probably isn’t the best way to fight the epidemic. Did anyone say, “Top Ten Fattest City in the U.S?” It’s not uncommon to see on the street a baby being fed a bottle full of Big Red Soda (cross between fruit punch and cream soda). Normally you wouldn’t know it’s Big Red if it weren’t for the Mother carrying a liter under each armpit.
Reason #39: Like many of you, I remember those days watching Clint or Nick playing little league, Mom coming home from work, or times when we’d be choking on Taco Soup. All three of these things have one thing in common: Mom holding a Diet Coke. Each of us, at one time or another, fell into the trap of sipping from that lipstick laden straw, convincing ourselves that it would taste good. Nope, wrong—at least at the time. Well, for me, I think my taste buds have changed. Before, I would rather have drunk a broccoli beerock shake than a swig of the Diet. Now, I find the regular stuff almost too sweet! And if I have a lime wedge available, that goes right in to the cup. I know, The Switch—it’s not diet, it’s a lifestyle change.
Now, I never thought the day would come when my food storage consisted of 36-can cases of Dr. Pepper in the garage, let alone Diet Dr. Pepper. You must be willing to adapt in this society. And to reassure all of you: Stranded. Desert Island. Water or Dr. Pepper. Dr Pepper. No Contest.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to check on my food storage.
