Tustison Humor

Can I get an amen somewhere? Nick has really been on a Tustison humor streak this week that has prompted me to question whether it is a seasonal outbreak or if Nick is an isolated case. I'll give you a couple examples, and then perhaps you can let me know if this behavior is a bit odd. (Sorry to preempt the Saw IV promo, Nick.)

Tuesday we had reservations at a nice restaurant with two other couples. My classes ran a little late, so I rode the subway with one of the other people who was also working in the city a little late that day. Nick was going to drive from our house to the end of the subway line and park after he droppedAiden off with the babysitter, and then ride in. When I got to the restaurant, I called Nick to see where he was in his travels, and he said he was waiting to get on the subway. Though I figured he should have been about ten minutes ahead of where he was, I knew there was still enough time for him to get to the restaurant, so I blew it off. We talked for a minute more, and then he said, "Just kidding, I'm already on the train and about a third of the way there." Completely perplexed as to what would compel a man to just blatantly lie like that, I asked my friend if that was funny. We completely agreed that it wasn't. Today, we were going to eat dinner with the same group of friends, and the one cooking dinner called Nick and asked him to bring our potato masher so she could finish the re-fried beans. When we got there, she asked for, and since Nick forgot, he drove the 6/10 of a mile back to get it. When he came in the second time, he handed over a whisk. My friend and I looked at each other, then Nick, and let him know that wasn't a potato masher. He acted all bummed out, and then pulled the potato masher out of his back pocket and started cackling (oh, he says he doesn't cackle, but he does). So, again, we had the "is that funny" debate and came to the same conclusion. So, my question for all of you is whether that is funny or just pathological lying? Has anyone else witnessed a recent outbreak ofTustison Humor? Actually, is that even Tustison Humor, or has Nick been away from the family for too long?

Only the Biggest Announcement Ever!

http://www.saw4.com

I apologize for preempting Chad's riveting narrative with Mom's unusually risque contributions. (Just kidding, but just think of what you can tell your book club as your reviewing another Nicholas Spark's book. Oh yeah, sorry for the additional comment but that reminds me---you and your book club should read No Retreat, No Surrender by Tom DeLay. Sweet title, huh? I haven't read it but I'm sure Chad has. You should ask him about it.) Anyway, folks, the big news is that the Saw series has a fourth forthcoming installment and I would be remiss if I did not inform my loved ones. Oh yeah, baby, we are soon to be treated with ethical considerations rivaling that of Nietzsche's Zarathustra and philosophical meanderings worthy of Plato all wrapped up in the twisted machinations of a deranged genius. In theatres October 26.

Disclaimer: I did not include the youtube link to the trailer for those with greater sensitivities but those who appreciate the imagery we have come to expect from Jigsaw (I'm talking about you, Mayka) email me and I'll send you the link.

Two quick stories from the land of little people (PC?)

So it was little embarrasing in church the other day. We were in sharing time and the 2nd counselor in the primary presidency was telling the story about Nephi’s broken bow. I thought I knew the story pretty well considering that I’ve read 1st Nephi about 827 times.

Well, one of my seven sunbeams was called up to hold a picture in front of the class and was also asked a question. I get nervous when the presenters ask questions because many times, I have no clue what the answer, especially when it comes to “Name that Tune.” Because I was helping another child in my class tie his shoes, I barely caught the question which was something like, “who did Nephi ask to find out where to hunt... and if you don’t know, I’m sure your teacher knows.” Well, in my woolgathering and distracted state, I leaned over and whispered to him, “Heavenly Father.” Well, that was completely the wrong answer and I don’t even know why I said it (it’s Lehi for those of you in a woolgathering and distracted state). I quickly went back to acting distracted.

Needless to say, they don’t ask my kids questions anymore.

A funny story that happened in my sunbeam class on the same day occurred as I was wrapping up my lesson. We were playing with very pale orange-ish play-doh that Jenn made the night before. They love play-doh and it makes frequent appearences to calm their craziness – a cheap opiate if you will.

Anyway, one of the kids is the child of the person with whom I home teach (he’s the senior companion) – very proper and by the book, calling to see what day I have scheduled appointments for...two months in advance. Anyway, his kid comes over to me, holds up his carrot-looking play-doh shape and says in a loud kid voice, “Look, it’s a penis”. Note that I always leave the door open in this high traffic area and was quick to point out that no, it was a carrot, and “we should all eat our vegetables and grow big and strong, etc.” He wouldn’t have that – he kept repeating that, indeed, it was penis. I quickly put up the play doh, and vowed to never use a pale orange color again.

Your dreams are being fulfilled through me!

Well, tickets are now on sale to see Vanilla Ice and I am going. It will be a huge setback to my bank account (costs 7.50) but I'll make the trek.

Typically I would try to write something funny, but.......just imagine Sam looking over my shoulder and saying duuummb.

Anyway, I got a calling in our ward last week. Assistant TO the Scout Master.

And Grace you may add that dollar to the March Madness money I will win in '08.

I Beg Of You!!!!

Somebody, please, post something on the blog so that we don't have to look at my face aniymore. I'll give you a dollar.
Thanks